Virtual Cheating

A friend of  mine thinks that havin secret and suestive conversations on-line is not cheatin because it is mere words rather than physical contact. Another friend believes that it is indeed a form of infidelity.

What do you think? Is cybersex or romantic emotional involvement with someone other than your partner   a form of cheatin?

Comments

[JCanuck]

I think that the answer to this is:

1. "If you caught your partner doing this, would it feel like he/she is cheating on you"?

2. "Would you let your partner sit beside you and read while you are doing this"?

If the answers are 1. Yes and 2. No, then it's cheating.

[Leanne]

Add me to the "cheating" list, if it's a secret from the spouse, it violates a fundamental trust in the intimacy between the couple. It's also "lying", in my book.

[Dave Diamond]

Anything, and I mean anything, that you don't tell your spouse about, is dishonest, lying, cheating, just wrong.

Now about that extra slice of pizza I had last night... :)

[Trish]

Absolutely cheating and is considered an "affair".

[panthergirl]

I started a conversation online with a fellow greyhound owner a few years ago. He was in a serious relationship, but after awhile he started to express some interest in me and wanted to get sexual (online only). He was struggling with the "is it or isn't it" question.

I told him that the absolute litmus test was: Would you tell your girlfriend?

If the answer is no, then it is most certainly cheating.

[aka_monty]

I have to go with cheating, or at least the INTENT. Why would you need to have those kinds of conversations if you're in a loving, committed relationship? If I had a significant other and found HIM doing that, I'd be pissed. Seriously pissed. And I'd wonder what we were lacking in our relationship.

[caught in the middle]

I have a question? If your spouse hides a phone number of an old school friend and "just talks" to him/her but has the phone number in the work cell phone and not in the personal cell phone, and doesnt tell you about it, is this a form of cheating?

[kingbee]

My wife likes to do this with someone far away.I don't like it. It hurts.We 've got three kids , i will not hurt them by leaving her, but...... My mind is a mess !!I don't know what to do??????????!!!!!!!!!!

[Tigresita]

I think it can work both ways, if you think about it. Cybersex, is non physical, also thinking of sex with others is not, it's just a taught. I dont think it really means anything unless you want it to come true and actually meet the person.

[Kephri.ngozi]

It is what it is - infidelity. I was in a group of 4 couples that played role-playing d&d. One woman decided to go after my husband using journals and her character in-game to hit on my spouse. She wrote long stories, private emails to my spouse, and went out of her way to break up my marriage. Luckily I nipped it in the bud and my husband was open and showed me the private emails. Unfortunately she then went on to the husband of my friend and they are now together and two marriage are destroyed.

[Michele]

test

[Dora]

( she sighs) So what happens? If you've always been honest, with what guy friends you have.... and then you find out, that your husband has been talking to someone over 4 years, without you knowing... and then throws it in your face, that he never said anything of the sort... when I was talking to my friends.. so should I let it go? Or should I give him a piece of my mind?

[Dora]

I mean.. people can have friends, but when your in a relationship... his friends are your friends, and you both should know about it period... Cheating is Cheating period, rather it's writing, talking on the phone, joking around, there's no way to get out of it, if your in a relationship, don't hurt them!!!! Cheating sucks!!!!! and we all know this....